Save a Little Love For Me


He grabs his boots, or his briefcase, or his suitcase – and He’s headed off to work.

She’s busy making breakfast for the little ones already awake. The cereal spills across the kitchen floor just as the baby monitor lights up. Someone else needs her too.

She pours milk into the bowl, steps over the mess, and as she walks towards the nursery she shouts over her shoulder, “LOVE YOU! Have a great day, honey!”

He knows there will be so much demanded of her. He knows that she will spend every ounce of who she is taking care of the house and the babies and the bills. She won’t get a break or get to stop worrying, or caring, or planning all day. He knows that she will be exhausted when he walks back through that door, but his hope is the same day after day.

As she disappears around the corner, he whispers under his breath, “Save a little love for me.”

For the nurse and the coach, for the teacher and the banker, for the clerk and the pastor –

For each of us, our hope is the same.

May we never pour out so much of ourselves that we don’t have anything left to give our spouse at the end day. May we never forget the love that was so abundant in the beginning. And may we never lose sight of forever.

A simple reminder from the ones that we love, and to the ones that we love –

No matter how you will spend your day,

Just save a little love for me.

 

 

 

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Only Good Mommies…

I used to think that good mommies were a group of women that did everything right.

You know. Good mommies don’t yell. They have endless patience. Good mommies balance life at home and work and every other group/organization they or their kids are a part of. Good mommies have clean houses and do crafts and they always always enjoy every moment of being around their children.

Good mommies don’t work… or do work… but whatever they choose to do, they never run out of energy. They are always ready for whatever comes next. And they do it with joy.

And their children never cry, or get bored, or eat cheese sticks and crackers as a suitable dinner.

But I have learned something in my short few years of being a mommy.

Those things and attitudes… sure, they are good. But they don’t make me a good mommy.

That mom that you think has it all together? She probably yelled this morning, or grabbed socks from the dirty hamper, or handed her kids a bag of mini oreos to eat for breakfast on the way to school. And you know, I bet that she struggles with the same feelings you do.

Because even the best mommies get it wrong sometimes. Even the best mommies fall behind, feel like they are letting everyone down, and struggle with feeling completely inadequate in their own homes.

Yes. There are good mommies. But they aren’t made by the lists of things they do or don’t do.

Good mommies are the women who keep loving, keep trying, and keep pouring out their hearts day after day.

And that, my dear, is most certainly you.

May these words remind you, that God knew exactly what He was doing when He gave you those sweet kids. And may you walk in the assurance that today is another day that you are a good mommy.

 

 

 

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To the Momma Who Needs to Vent


“I just cleaned this house!”

I sigh as I walk out of my bedroom and find a living room floor covered in toys AGAIN!

NO! No No No! I’m not cleaning this mess again today. I’m not doing it! I’m not going to spend all day sorting through these toys to get them put away nicely only to have you DUMP THEM BACK OUT ONTO THE FLOOR! These shoes go in this bucket. These socks go into this hamper. These books are not being read. Why are they on the floor? We just bought them. We need to treat them nicely and not WALK on them. Cups stay in the kitchen so that they do not… spill! Who brought their chocolate milk into the living room, and WHO spilled it?! That’s it! Nothing else is going to happen until we clean up this mess!

Four wide eyes stare blankly back at me as if I have just addressed them in a foreign language.

I sighed one of those “from the depths of my soul” sighs. And I try again.

“Guys. I’m going to need you to help mommy pick up this mess. Can we do this together?”

They nod their little heads up and down and scramble to find something to put away before Mom does whatever that was again.

Some days, it feels like I am just spinning my wheels and not getting anywhere. I pick up the same toys and the same shoes and fold the same laundry. I wash the same dishes and hang up the same wet towels, and I make the same beds.

Day after day after day after…

And some days, I just need to vent about it. I need to know that I’m not the only person who feels overwhelmed, or exhausted, or stressed.

But I have heard recently that moms who complain are givin’ other moms a bad rap… or rep… I guess I never had to write out that phrase… anyway, whatever that phrase is… they’re doing it.

And I realized this.

Motherhood is the only profession where you never get a day off, are on call 24/7, are often required to show up both days and nights, the work is never done but rarely ever seen, and even though you are stressed, sleep deprived, and downright exhausted… you must be happy and full of joy always or you might get a negative peer performance review.

Well, not here, ladies!

I don’t care if you are a stay at home mom, work at home mom, or work as a full-time employee and a full-time mommy – YOU and ME are in this together.

Yup. That’s right. Together. Because while the order of my days isn’t the same as yours – the ache to get it all right – to feel like we are making the best choices and not letting anyone down – yup, that’s the same or both of us. The desire to love fully and still have some strength left at the end of the day – yup, that’s the same for both of us too.

And some days, it’s hard not to complain – because some days are hard.

Real hard. Hard like, “here pick up this house and move it five feet to the left” hard. SO hard they seem impossible.

But YOU – you in the wonderful chaos that is sometimes difficult to celebrate – You aren’t hurting me by your frustration. You aren’t giving me a bad name with your moments of honesty.

You are real. Your life is real. And sometimes, it is not easy to find the joy in all of it.

But if I can just take a second. If I can encourage you for a minute.

Because, while there are moments in motherhood that seem to be barely survived let alone celebrated, you and I both know that there is also great joy.

Simple moments of over the top, fill my heart with gladness, makes all the madness worthwhile – joy.

The baby’s face when you come into the room after naptime.

The tiny arms around your neck at bedtime.

The giggles that only you can inspire by the silly sounds and playfulness during bathtime.

And the whispered, “I love you, Mommy,” just because.

We all need to feel like we can be honest with our feelings about motherhood. And honestly – all the grumbling in the world doesn’t make you a bad mom – or me a bad mom either. It just might mean that you need someone to tell you that you’re going to be okay and beyond that you’re doing a great job!

So, here’s to you. The employee of the month! If I had an office, I’d hang your picture in it! I would put your face on display as one of the best around so that everyone would know that YOU are a success.

Because you are.

Even on the days that you complain.

I try and stay in touch with my readers on a personal level through social media. Share this post to pass it on, and then click here to find me on Facebook.